Hey all,
It's been while since I posted something on this blog. Would like to sincerely apologize for my earlier broken promises. From February onwards, this blog will be basically to 1) write my blessings 2) reflections on cell group/service messages 3) A thank you note to friends and family or notable experiences in my life..
I'll try as best as possible to update it every week on wednesdays so I really hope you will continue to support my blogging aspirations. Ultimately, I created this blog to inspire and motivate, so that people can see how God works and how He can change lives. Why? because I believe we do have limited time on earth and with the advent of social media, it is a good platform where I can reach out with my thoughts, ideas and lessons about life and more importantly, how God has always been there for me.
I may not be of influence as yet but I am determined and I would like to treat each and everyone of you (if you are reading) with sincerity. So if you have any feedback on the blog do leave a comment or email me @ danielfoo85@hotmail.com
A little more about me for those who may not know is that I'm a graduate from NUS, with a major in Southeast Asia Studies. After graduation, I've worked about a year as an executive and switched to teaching.. Right now I've just completed Bible School and am having a temp job while waiting for MOE's results of a teaching position (history and social studies)
Though I'm a graduate, I haven't really achieved much in life. Before Bible School, I didn't have a focus, a desire or a need to change. I was just going through life by the motions without a thought about my future. Compared to my peers, I seemed to have fallen significantly. It seemed ok in the past as I thought being good enough to make it to NUS was good enough and subconsciously, I started using that as a determining factor of my worth.. Things started to change after that. Without the security of NUS, I based my worth on my career and having job hopped around , I was falling fast. I thought God would take care of everything as long as I continued going to Church and just did the bare minimum. ( Even though I was always inspired to succeed, but that inspiration would only last for about a month ) I was also under the conception that I don't need to worry as I'm still young.....and for the past 1 1/2 years, that became my mentality... until......
Somewhere towards the end of 2012, the truth hit me. Even more so when I wernt out for gatherings with friends from my batch. I must admit it is quite embarrassing to keep mentioning that I'm a temp staff while my friends talk about the stresses of work and how long they've been working for. Not to mention when we go to restaurants where I would struggle to order anything more than the cheapest item. Some of them have also been working for a period of time now and have significant improvements in their lives. (getting married, have a car, buying a flat)
This made me realize that I was not getting any younger but I was still in the same cycle, without a goal or focus. I was still stuck and I needed to get out quick! I needed a change!
Furthermore, I got to know a really good friend whom I've grown to have a liking for. However, the questions have hit me even harder. If I really get attached, am I ready for it ? can I provide for her stability ? Can I be someone she is proud of....? It's not just about her but it's about her friends and family's impression as well.
To top it off, I questioned God for my current predicament. Why, God, am I losing out to my peers? Why is it I cant succeed and be stable. I thought You are suppose to give us a 'hope and a future' and that 'all things work together for the good of those who believe? have I not been praying? ' Why why why? I blamed it on my inherent character of a soft-spoken, passive person and questioned God why I wasn't born bolder or with a louder voice or someone who is more people oriented. I thought that these are the people that are more blessed than me as they can naturally interact with people, colleagues, bosses and so on, especially if you're good looking as well.
And then it hit me. Unknowingly, although I was really aimless and unmotivated, God has been always providing for me all this while. I can honesty say without Him, I would be far less than what I am now. It's really amazing that God is always encouraging us and willing to give us chance after chance after chance to take many different routes to succeed even after multiple failures (which is why Pastor Paul's message on the weekend was very impactful for me) Yes, God will always be there for us but if we want to become Great and do mighty things for God, we have to wake up and make the effort to! We have to be fearless and determined to have a climbing addiction despite knowing we will fall and it can be quite painful.
When I was in the army spec course, I gave up when I couldn't take it , yet God blessed me with a combat pay service medic vocation (stay out) When I was in University, I didn't do too well for the subjects I wanted to major in but He opened up a third option for me and helped me get a very good grade and on the whole a fun and enriching experience majoring in another subject (Southeast Asian Studies) which I don't regret.
When I gave up on honors, giving myself 101 excuses on why I should give up even when I was already in the middle of the first semester, God still blessed me with a job 1 month after graduation that had an honors grad pay. When it got too stressful in my first job (even with quite a high pay) I left and gave up without finding another job. But, again, God blessed me with an equal pay opportunity to teach overseas soon after. When I didn't perform well for the initial study camp and was eventually cut from the teaching team overseas (partly also because of my indecisiveness), God still allowed me to get a position in the local school with a reasonable pay. When the term in the local school ended and I wanted to go to SOT, again God showed up and gave me so many tuition assignments that I was simply overwhelmed and at one point, my income was almost equal to my teaching job.
Tuition was not easy either, I had many cancellations (partly cause I didn't take it seriously initially) but the inflow of assignments to replace the cancellations kept on coming as well! It's really a miracle and it wasn't because I had many good referrals and so on. I even had 3 guitar assignments (quite well paid) when all I could play were basic chords and strumming patterns with only a 3mth Yamaha strum and sing cert!
Finally, after SOT, I applied for MOE. Little did I know the process is really really long and it has been about 4 mths since I applied. Yet, even through this waiting time, God has blessed me with an almost instantaneous part time office job back in the company which I left after less than a year. When the project ended for one department , again, God provided another opportunity in another department the very next week so I could continue having a rice bowl while waiting for MOE. Even just recently, I thought of not waiting to become a teacher due to all the stories fellow teachers have told me about their experiences and how tough it's gonna be. Even before starting I thought of giving up! Not any more!!! Yunyou gave me a very strong and powerful SMS 'BE A MAN, don't be so easily influenced by negativity'
Even though I was aimless, and gave up so many times, God still opened doors to hint to me to keep trying, keep believing, keep having faith!
Pastor A R Bernard once said ' Don't let the devil steal your FAITH!' even though I had not much progress in my career, the one thing that kept me from total failure was that I still had FAITH in God , going to Church and cell regularly and indeed God didn't disappoint..
Now that I look back. It seems as though if I didn't give up so easily, my career would have taken a very different path, I would have been much more successful by now. However, I also see that God still cares and is willing for me to learn from this. Time and time and time again He has opened new doors for me to learn from the past and have a breakthrough for the future!To get where He has originally intended me to be! It's like consistently saying 'Hmmm, you gave up again. It's ok I still believe in you!, here's another opportunity.'
Just like what Pastor Paul said, it's not about living a safe, secure careful life. Yes God will take care of you if you believe but God doesn't want you to stick to where you are. To be truly a great servant of God, you have to face your fears and be willing to breakout! let go, be willing to CLIMB without the fear of FALLING.
Just like David, God didn't outwardly and obviously give him a character or 'style' of an outspoken , relational person who looked like a King. In fact his own Father even overlooked him when the prophet Samuel knew a King was in his household. He could have easily given up and said that judging by his present situation and character, maybe I'm not really a king. However, what God did give David though, was the gift of FAITH. And how did he use it to become great? by stepping out BOLDLY in full confidence that with God, all things are possible despite how others may have judged him. God will always be there. David earned his greatness by trusting God and making an effort to build his character and abilities through trials, risks and determination! Pastor Paul says 'God moves when we move!'
Similarly, I used to look at my deficiencies and question God why cant I be like so and so, good looking, charismatic, outspoken and so on. Now I do know the answer! that it all lies with FAITH to believe! Faith to take action!
Somethings, God doesn't spoon feed you because He wants to build your character! Yes you may fall but God will always be there to pull you back up again. At the same time God will not just give the carrot in front of you. He wants to build your character and SUBSTANCE! Through your taking of actions to step out, He wants to build your personality, individuality and determination. And just like a silent GPS , when the time is right for a prompting or turn after a distance moved, He will show up to guide you. Indeed He is all powerful, all knowing and all present and He loves us with an everlasting love. Therefore we do not need to worry about the consequences of wrong choices or failures in life cause we know God will always bring us back to the right track if we have faith and take action to change!
I've woken up from my slumber, I've set an aim, a goal, a dream, a vision! I'm not going to give up now but I'm going to , like what Paul says in Philippians 4: 'I press on towards the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus!' I know that my worth it not based on my school or work, but in God and that in God , I am worthy and can 'do all things through Christ who strengthens me' Phil 4:13. No matter how many failures, my worth is always as a child of God and I know God will always be there and I can always bounce back as long as I keep the faith! Indeed, the breakthrough will come!
I really hope you enjoyed and am inspired by reading this post and I'll be trying my best to update every Wednesday !
Thanks for reading, and thanks for coming!
Regards,
Daniel Foo
danielfoo85@hotmail.com
